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幸福男,不难。

非常喜欢这部电影,虽然很多人批评这电影不好看,但对我来说,这电影是爱情很真实的写照。

以前觉得永远并不远,爱着爱着就会永远了。但现实教会了我,很多时候只有你自己傻傻地一厢情愿。感情说断就断,不爱就不爱了。很多事情,无形中早已回不去了。

记得那段当安真(女主角)要去找蓝天蔚(心仪的人)前,载萌萌(她女儿)去找瑞凡(她前夫)的时候,我哭得稀里哗啦。

萌萌拉着安真不肯放手,瑞凡就哄萌萌说:

“ 你不放手,妈妈又怎能幸福呢?”

(原谅我的啰嗦和敏感,但这句让我感概万分。执着于不该执着的东西时,又如何幸福呢?)

重看电视剧第一集的时候,他们可是一个非常温暖快乐的家庭。

几年时间,全都变了。

然后就会联想以前的自己和现在的自己,读回以前的日记,发觉自己无时无刻都在改变。

从曾经为你疯狂为你哭为你笑的小女孩到现在独立冷酷的自己。

(其实,我厌倦了独立。不是说生活上的独立,但精神上的独立。有时真的很希望有个朋友可以精神上依靠,但我怕我烦到别人。没办法啊,人到最后终究是一个人。)

说回那部电影,我觉得很真实的一个片段,就是安真原本就快要和天蔚注册结婚了,但她找借口去了厕所,脱下了戒指,离开了。

可能我这么说,你会觉得她好坏。但我不知为何,我很能明白她的恐惧。

她曾经被爱情伤得那么重,好不容易走过来,现在又要把自己刚补好的心重新交给另一个人,是你你不害怕吗?

好啦,可能你不害怕,可是我害怕。

有些人觉得当时我故意告诉全世界我分手了但我还活着之类的。我只能说,网上是我发泄情绪的管道之一。有胆你就去爱一个人,爱得死去活来每天没事就绕着他转然后突然间等他把你甩了,你就知道有多痛。

(这教会了我,我们不是当事人,我们不知道他们怎么想,即使你揣测了他的想法你也没资格这样下定论,因为你根本不是他。)

很自私地说,我害怕我再一次爱上一个人之后,又会重复同样的过程,得到同样的结果。我不想每天哭着睡觉哭着醒来哭着去学校,不想让我妹妹陪我一起哭,不想原本心情好好唱歌结果唱到自己又伤心去。我的赌注很大,我真的真的输不起,我只有那么一颗心,它伤不起。

我曾经以为男生很简单,可是经过听了那么多故事,我才发觉原来男生比女生更难了解。女生或许比男生有心机,但她的目的来来去去不就那几个,而且如果你去找她的闺蜜探消息,包你获益不浅。每个女生都只想成为某个男生的公主一样被呵护被疼爱,但男生他是否喜欢你对你什么感觉,仿佛只有他自己知道,他也不会告诉他朋友。

其实我也不明白为什么我会写这些东西出来,或许是荷尔蒙失调,或许是脑袋接错神经线,我不知道。但这些话藏在我的心里藏了好几个月,好压抑。

好啦,说别的。我觉得自己的缺点是自以为很厉害可以应付很多东西然后就傻傻地不会拒绝人家然后就自己拿来痛苦。可是我还是不想拒绝别人。唉,能帮就帮。如果我哪里有不足,请你原谅。

最近真的好累。我不想读科学,也不想读生意,我真的真的好想攻读语言。对我来说,语言是人类最常用的艺术。我可不可以不要为了迎合大众而放弃自己的理想?

好啦,我说够了。谢谢你花时间耐心地读这篇文章。

祝你有个美好的一天。


“风景一直以来都很漂亮,生命一直以来都很美好,只是看你用什么心境去欣赏和体会。” —— 我自己想的。哈哈哈哈哈哈

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